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All I Want For Christmas is You… (to Stop Sending Crap Christmas Emails)

Thu 13th Dec 2018
By Todd

It’s December. The world is getting ready to wind down and relax for the festive time of year. It doesn’t seem to matter whether you celebrate Christmas or not, a break is coming and it’s a welcome one.

But do you know what isn’t welcome? Do you know what most businesses will hurriedly do this month that’s pretty much on par with those emails about GDPR?

You know.

“Merry Christmas from XXX company.”


“We’d like to wish all our customers a Happy Christmas and Prosperous New Year with this jpg image of us in hilarious jumpers!”

or even

“Here’s a blank picture with a red X in the corner as we sent you a jpg and your email client didn’t load it. Happy New Year!”

Email marketing gone wrong
Oh wow… festive!

Seriously… piss off!

No one, and I mean NO ONE CARES about these emails.

Nothing says, “Send to all” like a generic last minute, careless, thoughtless Christmas email.

Do you know what’s worse? When you’ve not emailed your list all year either!

You’ve ignored email all year and now someone decided to save on postage and send a mass email that’s about as personal and as unique as slap in the face with a beige flannel!

Just don’t bother.

Just delete it now. It’ll save your email recipients from doing it!

All I Want For Christmas is You… (to Stop Sending Crap Christmas Emails)

All I Want For Christmas is You… (to Stop Sending Crap Christmas Emails)

A Chimp is for life, not just for Christmas

Send marketing emails from Mailchimp (or whoever you use) throughout the year, not just once in December.

Sending a physical card is better.

We’ve had calls, tweets, and messages and even real life conversations thanking us for the Christmas card we sent.

Christmas email templates

(Oh my… I feel soooooo special right now!)


There’s another way to do email…

(It’s called giving a crap about your customers and clients.)

Here are a few email crimes to avoid:

  • Don’t address “all our customers” in your email. Your entire email list doesn’t meet up in a big room to open and read your email together. They all read it alone… if they even read it at all.
  • Make the email personal. Mailchimp and other platforms allow you to insert their first name at the beginning or the email. Do it.
  • Stop sending red X’s. Pictures don’t always load. Send plain text and give the graphic designer an early Christmas break. Send words, not X’s.
  • Don’t put ‘Happy Christmas’ in the subject line. Most people will delete it instead of opening it. YOU’LL BLEND IN.
  • Don’t leave it till the last minute. Nothing says “We don’t care” or “Fuck, we forgot the customers” like a last minute, poorly written email from you as you leave the office for the drinks and nibbles with the accounts department.

Christmas email templates

Seriously… save your time!

Do something more useful to your business like clean the toilet or descale the office kettle.

You’re doing NOTHING positive for your business with those emails. You’re adding zero value.


There’s another way…

You still have time to send something special. Something personal. Something that doesn’t blend in. Something that’s not beige with baubles!

We’re on a mission to #StopCrapChristmasEmails and we need your help.

  1. Share this post with everyone you know now. There’s still time to stop the madness.
  2. Start thinking about a different way to ‘reach out’ this Christmas. (If you’re the Four Tops.)
  3. Ask us to write an email for you instead.

Look, if you’ve gotta send an email because you’ve always done it then at least let us help you. We can create something that your clients and customer will smile at, read, and ultimately – actually give you a few seconds of their attention this December.

Marketing is all about being memorable, not scrollable and deleteable.

Stop the madness. Spread the word now!


#StopCrapChristmasEmails by sharing this post or asking the cowboys to scribe you a festive email that’ll be the talk of the office, not the top of the recycle bin!

Remember: a chimp (a Mailchimp) is for life, not just for Christmas. And no one asked Santa for a jpg in their box!


Contact us now if you’d like to stand out this Christmas. Our fingers are waiting to tap out some words that will get tongues wagging!

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3 comments on this article

  • Paul Valentine at 11:32am on December 13th 2018

    Good post Todd & Co. Well said.

  • Charlie Budd at 11:33am on December 13th 2018

    I totally agree, there are loads of really rubbish emails.

    BUT, I was involved in one Christmas email for a client this year, filming a slow motion cocktail making video, with a charity message at the end. It’s fun, it’s unique, and it promotes a good cause.

    I have to admit, it does look great, and was a team effort.

    Christmas emails are fine if done well, but you’re SO right Todd, we need to make them stand out, and make them a part of making all our customers feel special by communicating with them throughout the year.

    As always, a great post!

    1. Todd at 14:30pm on December 13th 2018

      Oh… completely. Done well, they’re a winner. But 99.999999999% are shit.

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