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I don’t Want to Talk to You Right Now! (Welcome to 2018)

Mon 8th Jan 2018
By Todd
Social Media

Years ago there were very few ways to contact a business. The phone, fax, or a letter were the most popular options.

Then of course along came email, transforming the way we send and receive business messages.

More recently there’s been a huge rise in instant messaging being used for business purposes too. Facebook, WhatsApp and Twitter have opened up the contacting game.

But there’s a problem with the way some businesses use messages.

I don’t Want to Talk to You Right Now! (Welcome to 2018)

I don’t Want to Talk to You Right Now! (Welcome to 2018)

Sarah is in her office. She’s trying to book a table for the weekend at a local restaurant. She doesn’t want to call because she’s at work.

She probably shouldn’t really be spending work time doing this, but she wants to organise herself so she chooses to send a Facebook message to book the table. She saw the restaurant post a tasty looking photo of a meal on her timeline so she decides that’s a good place to try.

Sarah doesn’t want to call them.

Paul needs to arrange a hair cut with a barber in town. He’s currently holding conversations with friends on a WhatsApp group chat, a Twitter DM conversation with a new connection, and over on Facebook messenger he’s chatting with his team.

He drops the barbers a message on Instagram as he sees they’re active on there. They often share new cuts and fashion styles on their Instagram.

Paul doesn’t want to call them, and he doesn’t want them to call him.

I don’t Want to Talk to You Right Now!

Instant messages are part of the 21st century way of life

We live in an on-demand world with Netflix, Amazon, Uber and Spotify helping us have what we want when we want it. That’s not to mention Just Eat or Deliveroo.

We manage our lives how we want, when we want, and the key thing here is the time we do it.

Both Sarah and Paul decide when they speak to people. They’re not beholden to when they can talk to them and neither are the people they speak to.

Messenger and WhatsApp are popular because you control when you reply and when you start them. Ideally the people you message will come back pretty quickly, but in essence it doesn’t matter if it’s an hour later or a day later. If it was that important or urgent the phone is always available.

Instant messaging helps people organise their lives and have multiple conversations at once on one device wherever they are.

They can call from that device, they just choose not to.

Is this textable?

If you’re a business then you need to understand that.

Answer your PMs with PMs. It’s not ‘cool’ or edgy, it’s just the way people are! It’s basic customer service to reply to a customer in the way they want to speak to you.

Three are three times as many social media messages sent than there are text messages. It’s just how we communicate now.

The takeaway is this:

You get a PM. Don’t call them back. If they wanted to talk, they’d have called you!

Yes, calling is far deeper and more powerful but it’s not on their terms and it’s not what they want.

They want to control when then reply to you. They want to respond in their own time. They want ‘on-demand communication’, just like their TV.

They could be doing a hundred other things at once. Their baby might be sleeping. They might be planning something quietly, like a gift or day out.


The other day I was at home over lunch time. Jo’s phone rang…

It was a company she’d messaged on social media about a service she wanted.

She messaged, they called.

Now you might think that was good service, but Jo didn’t want to talk. Jo needed a couple of simple questions answered. That was it. A reply to the message is all she needed; she could pick up the reply when she wanted.

Yes, she was grateful they got back to her, but she hates being interrupted by unscheduled phone calls. Two of her favourite memes are here:

When the company called her, they took over deciding when it was time for Jo to have her answer. They changed the rules. They, the supplier, decided not to talk to Jo on her terms.

When you think about it, that’s a mistake.

Sorry I missed your call...

If I called a business right now and they refused to answer me on the phone, opting for sending me a letter, I’d be quite annoyed.

Your customers choose how they want to be contacted by the medium they contact you on. (Unless they specifically ask you to use another method.)


In 2018 they are multiple ways to be contacted and your customers are all different

It’s not that they being awkward or trendy – they’re just managing all their conversations and interactions in one place, when they want. On demand and on their timescale.

Who are you to change that?

If you have Facebook messages turned on then you might want to consider replying and having the conversation on there when someone uses it, rather than opting to call each time.

If you’re spending time posting on Instagram and someone drops you a PM then reply to them there! Don’t head for the phone unless they’re happy to.

Offering instant messaging as a serious communication tool for your business is a great move – especially given that so many people make buying decisions in the evening and even at night, when shops and offices are closed.

It’s a fast-paced digital world and we are now, more than ever, deciding when we want to be contacted and managing many conversations at once.

It’s not rude, it’s just good customer service, and many will opt for on-demand conversations like this.

It’s not up to you to decide how your customers contact you or when that communication line changes.

We live in an on-demand world, and it’s your customers and potential who demand it.

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15 comments on this article

  • Diane at 7:36am on January 9th 2018

    Love this article!
    Being a bit on the more mature side I’m still surprised when companies text me but actually it makes so much more sense from a business aspect. The message is out there rather than a failed telephone call. On the flip side, such a shame we’re all too busy in our lives that we don’t have the time to a have conversations on the phone with businesses.Sometimes that personal touch can make all the difference as to whom we chose to work with.

    1. Ernie at 10:40am on June 15th 2020

      I agree however the customer may be expecting it to operate as every other bussiness and jt clearly doesnt follow the inside the box some point in time through out history people societys bussiness and even our personal lives have had to evolve it is thesetimes when those evolving appear to cast all s.o.p aside and do whAt the masses are wanting to do but are to comfortable or too set in old ways of doing reminded of a scene from Edward scissor Hands. When all the women line up and are curious but no one wants to jump off that bridge or at least no one wants to be the first to jump. Then the timid one says “ill doit” and th.c e experience isnothing less than cosmic.

    2. Todd at 10:12am on January 12th 2018

      I do love a phone call. I have 12 planned for Monday. But… on my terms and pre-arranged. It’s just the way my on-demand life works!

  • Geraldine at 8:32am on January 9th 2018

    Some of us ‘oldies’ will remember using telex machines before the fax arrived on the scene! My first job was in Export Marketing, so that was our main means of communicating with overseas customers & distributors. Painfully slow as you can imagine…

    These days my preferred biz communication method is email as it doesn’t interrupt my work flow (or whatever else I’m doing at the time) & gives me a ‘paper’ trail to refer back to if needed. I get annoyed when some clients always insist on ringing me instead, but I guess it’s their prerogative – never really thought of it that way before!

    1. Todd at 10:12am on January 12th 2018

      It’s just more manageable, right?

  • Maggie at 9:19am on January 9th 2018

    What a great article and the timing is perfect for where I am at right now!

    I love to talk (!!) but also love responding via text and Whatsapp where I PM a lot so very familiar with using the systems.

    But I’m only now starting to include ‘messenger’ buttons on my fb posts, and later today will find out how to have/use a business Whatsapp and Instagram messages.

    2018 #BraveNewWorld 🙂

    1. Todd at 10:13am on January 12th 2018

      Go get em, Maggie!

  • Steve Adlard at 10:03am on January 9th 2018

    Nice article Todd, and one I instinctively want to argue with, but suspect I might end up agreeing. We should have a good chat about it 🙂

    1. Todd at 10:10am on January 12th 2018

      Haha… I love an argument… I mean constructive chat!

  • Helena at 14:23pm on January 9th 2018

    Never looked at it this way. Thank You.

    1. Todd at 10:11am on January 12th 2018

      I do tend to see the other side of the dime!

  • Mandy Fard at 18:21pm on April 8th 2019

    Thank you for this blog. I really enjoyed reading it. I found it when I put this query into Google: ” I am in sales but I don’t want to talk to anybody”.

    So, I am responding from a business owner perspective. I am a solo-preneur without support staff and I provide resume writing services. In short, I am a Technical Writer who needs to stay focused on writing.

    I have created a detailed website, post relevant content on social media every day, write a blog, and do everything else I can to have an active voice in my market and to respond to all questions that my prospective clients have. Nonetheless, they all want to call ne first and “CHAT” with me about their resume. In other words, they all want to pick my brain first to see if they can get enough information and figure out if they can then do the job on their own.

    I do not operate a “chat line”. I operate a writing business. I can’t get on the phone and repeat everything that is on my website in the name of “chatting”. But as you have so well described, this is the way my clients are behaving and I am not sure how to resolve the conundurm. So far, I have been responding to everyone by text, by email, and less phone calls. I have even explained in my Terms of Service that phone calls are provided at a minimum…. Regardless, they want to “chat” turning me into somewhat of a Chatty Cathy, terrified of the phone!

    1. Todd at 14:56pm on April 23rd 2019


      I feel your pain! It’s why we have a 15 minute ‘Discovery Call’ option. We use Acuity Scheduler to help us book these in and it stops too much of our time being ‘picked’! I feel that we do need to talk to clients and prospects though. I just select the times when I’m available to do that.

      1. Mandy Fard at 21:01pm on August 13th 2019

        Thank you so much for your reply. I did start to use Calendly and linked it to I will admit that so far, it has made life a little easier and I just wanted to thank you for replying to my comment, feeling my conundrum, and most importantly pointing me to the right direction. Thanks a bunch! 🙂

        1. Todd at 10:44am on August 17th 2019

          Well done!

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